Inspiration and Answers

There's an adage that says that luck happens when opportunity meets preparedness. I decided tonight that inspiration (and answers) can happen when preparedness meets need.

In seminary, we learn "scripture mastery" scriptures. While all being good scriptures, and also dealing probably in part with core principles, I always wondered what went into the selection of them. It wasn't until years later, when struggling to get my life back on track, that I would periodically remember or think of scriptures that would be appropriate to the trial I was having. Many times, the scriptures I thought of were those that I had learned in high school in my seminary classes.

Tonight, I found myself frustrated. I felt like I was doing everything that I was supposed to be doing, but I still felt like I wasn't feeling the spirit the way I should be. I didn't understand why I wasn't feeling better. I was genuinely trying my best, shouldn't I feel better than I did? This came after several days of feeling blah and not feeling like I thought I should, considering my sincerity in doing what was right.

While I was feeling that way, I envisioned a conversation with a friend, where I told the friend that I felt like I was "brickwalling" and not feeling good or making progress. I started laughing immediately once I thought of this. Why? Several days ago, I read The Last Lecture. One of the things that Mr. Pausch said was "brick walls are there to test how badly we want something." It made sense. I felt like what I was experiencing was a test of my faith. I was experiencing a test to see just how badly I wanted to do what was right. Would I continue to do what I should, holding out in faith that I would be rewarded?

So, then, by having sought wisdom by reading a good, healthy book, I prepared myself in my moment of need to remember that statement, and to be able to apply it in my life. I think that it's just so with inspiration. The more good things we ingest, the easier things can come to us when we need them. Had I not read previously this comment made by Mr. Pausch, I would possibly had not made so easily the connection between why I was feeling the way I was. Certainly, my "brick wall" wouldn't have been immediately correlated with a test of how bad I wanted to do what was right.

I don't think that inspiration can ONLY come through things we've read or otherwise ingested into our conscious, I think this is merely one more vessel for the Lord to speak to us and to instruct us. It stands to reason, then, that the more we fill our minds with good things, the more easily we will be able to remember and utilize those things we've learned in our hour of need.

Did everything become better upon this discovery? No, but I now realize that this is one more test of my own faith, to continue to "go and do" even when I don't feel immediately rewarded for it.